Amber Knows Your “List” Is Ruining Your Dating Life

In this episode of If You Knew Better , Amber Grimes challenges women to rethink modern dating by throwing away rigid relationship checklists in favor of 5 non-negotiables that prioritize character, compatibility, and emotional safety. Amber opens by inviting listeners to question their dating "type" [00:00] before explaining why it's time to let go of limiting checklists [01:13] and how that mindset shift transformed her own love story [03:14] .

She reveals why attraction often grows through emotional connection rather than first impressions [04:56] , explores the idea that many people know more about what they don't want than what they truly need [08:44] , and introduces a practical framework for building healthier relationships through five intentional relationship buckets [10:33] . Amber then breaks down the first four non-negotiables—safety [12:16] , communication and emotional availability [14:18] , shared values [17:06] , and future lifestyle alignment [19:33] .

The conversation concludes by encouraging listeners to identify one authentic deal-breaker instead of an endless list of preferences [22:34] , expand their dating pool by casting a wider net [24:22] , and approach dating with greater intention through meaningful conversations rather than surface-level attraction [27:00] . Amber also reminds listeners that healthy relationships are built on mutual choice—not chasing someone who doesn't choose you back [30:56] —before leaving the audience with a practical exercise to redefine their approach to love [31:43] .

Combining actionable dating advice, self-reflection, and relationship wisdom, this episode offers a refreshing roadmap for anyone ready to build stronger, healthier, and more intentional connections. Ask or Share with Amber: withambergrimes@ Follow Amber Grimes on Instagram: @ambergrimes Get Amber's Newsletter on Substack Watch This Episode on Youtube Thursday at 6pm ET Follow Amber's Book Club Get Amber's Book Club Merch Read Amber's Favorite Books See for privacy information.