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Shows›Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer
Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer
Society & CultureComedyHealth & Fitness

Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer

Headgum & Nicole Byer·459 episodes·Weekly

0 followers

Love and dating can be messy—so let’s talk about it! On this multi-award-winning podcast, comedian Nicole Byer explores romantic highs, lows, and all the juicy stuff in between, alongside comedians, experts, and sometimes an ex or two.

New episodes every Friday!

Episodes

Latest Episode

The Truth About Drag Race Showmances (w/ Lydia B Kollins)

July 24, 2026 · 45m

Drag queen Lydia B Kollins ( Drag Race S17, All Stars S10 ) joins Nicole to spill the behind-the-scenes tea on her iconic Drag Race showmance with Kori King. Find out just how strict production really is when it comes to off-screen flirting, what it was like having their first kiss during a lip sync for your life, plus the reason why she fully ghosted Kori after filming wrapped. Plus, Lydia opens up about her history of dating women and "dabbling in the puss." She explains why she believes it's easier to love a woman than a man, and why she builds her live shows specifically for her sapphic fans. Finally, hear the story of why RuPaul personally bestowed her with the middle name "Butthole." Get tickets to her tour with Kori King and Suzie Toot, "ButtTootKing" at . Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at Support this podcast by checking out our sponsors: • SmileSet : Listeners of our show get an additional 35% discount when they go to . With this discount, you can get the smile of your dreams for under 13 hundred bucks! • Squarespace : Head to to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME. • Sleep Doctor : Take back your sleep. Find out how at . • Planned Parenthood : Donate to support Planned Parenthood now at Check out all of our sponsors and discount codes at wwydm.notion.site/sponsors . Follow: All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudateme Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcast TikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyer X: @nicolebyer This is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via . See Privacy Policy at and California Privacy Notice at .

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More Episodes

Sharing Trade (w/ Willam Belli)

Jul 17 · 59m

Drag queen icon Willam (Drag Race S4, host of Race Chasers) returns! She joins Nicole to break down the mathematical formula for the optimal orgy, the proper etiquette for passing good trade around to your drag sisters, and what really goes down inside LA's underground sex dungeons. Willam also reveals her pro tips for scheduling multiple hookups in one night and confesses the absolute kinkiest thing she's ever done. Plus, hear the hot story of how she met her 6'6" lawyer ex-husband at the door of Micky's, why she turned to OnlyFans to pay her two mortgages, and why she simply has to stop hooking up with the contestants on her new dating show, Love's a Drag.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastSupport this podcast by checking out our sponsors:• Firstleaf: Get personalized wines, delivered. Head to TryFirstleaf.com/DATEME to sign up and you'll get 50% off your first box PLUS free shipping for an entire year• Cash App: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3v6r90n6 #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.• Audible: Listen to Heads Will Roll: Heir Apparent, available now on Audible. Go to Audible.com/headswillrollseries to start listening today.• Wayfair: Ready to upgrade your home for way less? Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home and get your space ready for less.Check out all of our sponsors and discount codes at wwydm.notion.site/sponsors.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

My Career Ruined My Relationships (w/ June Jambalaya)

Jul 10 · 47m

Drag queen June Jambalaya (Drag Race S14) joins Nicole to discuss hiding her drag career from her dates, being engaged twice, and leaving her fiancé to compete on Drag Race. Plus, Nicole and June discuss the best city to be depressed in, reveal the wildest things they've done to impress a man, and June shares her amazing date after being set up by Kerri Colby.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastSupport this podcast by checking out our sponsors:• Warby Parker: Our listeners can buy one prescription pair and get 20% off any additional pairs at WarbyParker.com/DATEME — and using our link helps support the show. #WarbyParker #ad• Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.• Audible: Listen to Heads Will Roll: Heir Apparent, available now on Audible. Go to Audible.com/headswillrollseries to start listening today.• Planned Parenthood: Donate to support Planned Parenthood now at PlannedParenthood.org/defendCheck out all of our sponsors and discount codes at wwydm.notion.site/sponsors.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hiring a Zoom Stripper (w/ Liza Treyger)

Jul 3 · 1h 1m

Comedian and friend Liza Treyger (Night Owl, host of That's Messed Up) returns to the podcast! She shares her sobering experience hiring a Zoom stripper for a bachelorette party, how Heated Rivalry changed her life, and the struggle of making friends easily while her dating life remains in the dumps. Liza tells the story about how she got scammed by a stylist while making her Netflix special, her goal to quit weed for a relationship, and why she believes it's an actual safety hazard to date a man who isn't completely obsessed with you.Watch Liza's special, Night Owl on Netflix.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastSupport this podcast by checking out our sponsors:• BetterHelp: This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/dateme today to get 10% off your first month.• Audible: Listen to Heads Will Roll: Heir Apparent, available now on Audible. Go to Audible.com/headswillrollseries to start listening today.Check out all of our sponsors and discount codes at wwydm.notion.site/sponsors.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tossing Shade (w/ Bosco)

Jun 26 · 49m

Drag queen icon Bosco (Drag Race S14, All Stars S10) makes her return to toss even more shade. She shares why the secret to polished drag is having mean friends, how to filter out dumb men in your dating life, and trades stories with Nicole about their most questionable fashion eras. They also discuss facial feminization surgery (and the boy queens getting it) and why we all need some more razzle dazzle in our lives. Plus, Nicole has become a human white noise machine for the nice man in her life.See Bosco on tour! Get tickets at dragfans.com. Buy 2 tickets, get the 3rd free. The whole polycule can come!Check out Bosco's new Magic The Gathering show, Spell Slayers on YouTube.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastSupport this podcast by checking out our sponsors:• Warby Parker: Our listeners can buy one prescription pair and get 20% off any additional pairs at WarbyParker.com/DATEME — and using our link helps support the show. #WarbyParker #ad• Chime: Chime is not just smarter banking, it is the most rewarding way to bank. Join the millions who are already banking fee free today. Head to Chime.com/DATEME.• Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.• Audible: Listen to Heads Will Roll: Heir Apparent, available now on Audible. Go to Audible.com/headswillrollseries to start listening today.Check out all of our sponsors and discount codes at wwydm.notion.site/sponsors.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Creatively Building a Family (w/ Sabrina Jalees)

Jun 19 · 58m

Comedian Sabrina Jalees (Mating Season) returns to the podcast! Sabrina talks about how she and her wife made a family, including picking out a sperm donor and performing a home insemination using a dog catheter. They break down the recent news about websites hosting non-consensual "sleep content" and the terrible networks of men coaching each other on how to assault their partners. Sabrina shares her attempt at a magic trick proposal while her partner dealt with a bathroom emergency, and they discuss: Can 2 butches make a right? Plus, why we need to rethink how we speak about pregnancy loss, and Sabrina makes a strong case for freezing your eggs.Check out Mating Season on Netflix.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastSupport this podcast by checking out our sponsors:• FirstLeaf: Get personalized wines, delivered. Head to TryFirstleaf.com/DATEME to sign up and you'll get 50% off your first box PLUS free shipping for an entire year• Cash App: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3v6r90n6 #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Having a Self-love Affair (w/ Jujubee)

Jun 12 · 48m

You ready for some good juju? This week, iconic drag queen Jujubee (Drag Race, Stop! That! Train!) joins Nicole to talk about the power of self-love and why she’s officially stopped looking for a relationship. Nicole pays tribute to her first dog, Charlie, and the two discuss why the true soulmates are actually the animals in our life. Jujubee shares her philosophy on why love never dies, and opens up about the clarity she's found from being 9 years sober. She shares her best advice on having the ultimate solo date, and the two Delta Diamond Divas share their travel tips.Go see Stop! That! Train! in theatres today. Check out Jujubee's latest EP, MESS FOR YOU.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastSupport this podcast by checking out our sponsors:• Jones Road Beauty: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Gift with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad• Warby Parker: Our listeners can buy one prescription pair and get 20% off any additional pairs at WarbyParker.com/DATEME — and using our link helps support the show. #WarbyParker #ad• Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.• Wayfair: Patio season is here and these deals won’t last! Head to Wayfair.com right now to get your outdoor space ready for way less.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Setting Relationship Boundaries (w/ Trixie Mattel)

Jun 5 · 1h 15m

Drag queen Trixie Mattel (Drag Race S7, All Stars 3) returns to the podcast! After experiencing how exhausting it is to navigate a private breakup while smiling through a press tour, Trixie opens up about why she is now fiercely protective of her new relationship. Nicole explains why Drag Race S7 is her all-time favorite season, and the girls discuss wild dating reality TV shows like 90 Day Fiancé, Love After Lockup, and Love on the Spectrum, plus whether Trixie would ever actually compete on The Traitors. Trixie also discusses her impersonator recent retirement, gives her honest advice to all the gay singles out there, and reveals her obsession with crime scene cleanup.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTake our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!Support this podcast by checking out our sponsors:• Jones Road Beauty: Use code DATEME at jonesroadbeauty.com to get a Free Gift with your first purchase! #JonesRoadBeauty #ad• Betterhelp: This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/dateme today to get 10% off your first month.• Cash App: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/3v6r90n6 #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Measuring Love & Male Delusion (w/ Tracie Thoms)

May 29 · 52m

Tracie Thoms (RENT, The Devil Wears Prada 2) joins Nicole to discuss her 8-year journey to join the iconic cast of RENT, the wild logic men use to avoid commitment, and why some of them want all the benefits of a girlfriend with zero of the responsibility. Tracie also breaks down the nightmare of having dated someone who tried dictate her career, and reveals why living apart from her partner has actually been the ultimate relationship hack. Plus, why does true love make you feel sleepy? And Nicole opens up about her PMDD diagnosis.I'm just such a big fan of RENT and so happy we have Joanne on, omg folks this is a big one for me personally. Rentheads unite!Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTake our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!Support this podcast by checking out our sponsor:• Squarespace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Would You Date You? (w/ Relationship Therapist Esther Perel)

May 22 · 1h 6m

World famous relationship therapist Esther Perel has been studying relationships for over 40 years. She joins Nicole to share the most common problems couples seek therapy for, the 3 types of conflicts we fight over, and how to productively resolve them. Esther discusses how to get over "icks" while dating, and challenges us to ask ourselves: what "icks" would people find in you? They also explore exactly why modern dating feels so incredibly tough right now, the fact that therapy speak has gone mainstream thanks to shows like The Sopranos, and whether that's a good or bad thing. Plus, Esther shares a wild story about her first therapy session between a man and his AI girlfriend, and she totally flips the script on Nicole to ask the ultimate question: Would you date you?Celebrate the 20th anniversary of her groundbreaking book, Mating in Captivity.Watch this episode on our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/@WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTake our listener survey and shape the future of the podcast!Support this podcast by checking out our sponsor:• Chime: Chime is not just smarter banking, it is the most rewarding way to bank. Join the millions who are already banking fee free today. Head to Chime.com/DATEME.Follow:All Links: linktr.ee/whywontyoudatemeTour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastakenYouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerThis is a Headgum podcast. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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H

Headgum & Nicole Byer

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