S3:EP3 YOU DIDN’T WANT LOVE. YOU WANTED TO FINALLY FEEL CHOSEN.

There is a difference between wanting to be loved and desperately needing to be chosen. And when you’ve spent years feeling overlooked, rejected, abandoned, compared, or not good enough, somebody choosing you can feel like proof that you finally matter.

But being chosen does not automatically mean being loved well. In this episode of The Quiet As Kept Podcast , Shawnti B. gets raw about validation, rejection, attachment, overgiving, chasing emotionally unavailable people, accepting crumbs, and the dangerous ways we can confuse attention with affection and being wanted with being valued.

Drawing from her memoir Quiet As Kept , Shawnti reflects on her own desire to belong, the lessons she learned about love, and the uncomfortable realization that sometimes we aren’t fighting for the relationship—we’re fighting for what being chosen would prove about us. We’ll also examine research on rejection sensitivity, childhood experiences, adult attachment, and why rejection can hurt so damn badly.

And then comes the question: If you already knew you were worthy, would you still want the person you’re trying so hard to convince to choose you? Grab your journal.

This one might expose some things. Send us Fan Mail Support the show Shawnti Boswell is an Award Winning Master Certified Mental Health Coach, Keynote Speaker, and Author of the best-selling book, “Quiet As Kept”, specializing in guided journaling for mental wellness.

After overcoming severe depression and anxiety through journaling, Shawnti developed her own program, empowering individuals to heal and thrive without medication. She is the creator of Shawnti Refuge Journals, which carries a series of guided journals designed to help others release past traumas.

With her relatable, no-nonsense approach, Shawnti's mission is to inspire personal growth and self-awareness. She is the founder of Stayin' Stuck Ain't Cute Coaching and a passionate advocate for mental health in both business and community settings.

Website: Social media: IG: @shawntibsays FB: Shawnti Boswell, MA, CMHC TikTok: @shawntibsays YouTube: @shawntibsays