131. Why We Eat, Shop, and Scroll When We're Stressed

Episode 131: Why We Eat, Shop, and Scroll When We're Stressed You've had a DAY. You're stressed, lonely, disappointed, overwhelmed—or maybe you simply feel off.

What do you reach for? Food?

Amazon? The remote?

Social media? Work?

A drink? Or maybe...that person you KNOW you have absolutely no business texting?

In this episode of Bounce Back, Black Woman!, Del explores the everyday ways we reach for comfort—and why the behavior itself may not be the most important part of the story. Food isn't inherently the problem.

Shopping isn't inherently the problem. Watching television isn't inherently the problem.

The deeper question is: What job are you asking that behavior—or person—to do for you? In This Episode Why wanting comfort is completely human The difference between enjoying something and using it to avoid a feeling How food can become more than food Why shopping can provide anticipation, control, reward, or something to look forward to How scrolling, streaming, sleeping, working, and constant busyness can become forms of escape Why some coping behaviors are actually rewarded as productivity or ambition How people, sex, attention, and validation can also become things we "reach for" The difference between comforting yourself and escaping yourself Why paying attention to how you feel afterward can reveal what a behavior is really doing Why simply removing a coping behavior without understanding the need underneath it may not work How awareness creates the opportunity to make a different choice Comfort vs.

Numbing Comfort says: "This hurts, and I'm going to care for myself while I'm experiencing it." Numbing says: "I don't want to experience this. Give me something that makes it disappear." Sometimes the exact same activity can be either one.

The question isn't simply what you're doing. It's the job you're asking it to perform.

A Reminder From This Episode Sometimes we're trying to remove the solution our brain found without addressing the problem it was trying to solve. Instead of immediately asking: "How do I stop doing this?" Try asking: "What does this do for me?" What feeling does it give you?

What feeling does it help you avoid? What need are you trying to meet?

And is there another way to meet that need without creating another problem? Faith Reflection Psalm 46 reminds us to: "Be still, and know that I am God." Sometimes stillness is difficult because it creates room for the thoughts and feelings we've been trying not to experience.

Instead of immediately reaching for something to change how we feel, sometimes we can create enough quiet to simply tell God the truth: I'm lonely. I'm scared.

I'm angry. I'm disappointed.

I'm exhausted. I'm grieving.

I'm overwhelmed. Stillness doesn't require us to solve the feeling.

Sometimes it simply helps us recognize it. Bounce Back Challenge This week, catch yourself reaching.

You don't even have to stop the behavior. Just pause long enough to ask: What am I feeling right now?

What am I hoping this will do for me? Will this comfort me—or am I trying to escape myself for a little while?

Then make your choice. The goal isn't perfect behavior.

The goal is noticing. Because awareness creates choice.

Kitchen Table Conversation LIVE Join us on September 21st for the first Bounce Back, Black Woman! Kitchen Table Conversation LIVE.

This live virtual gathering will create space for honest conversation, reflection, laughter, and connection. Follow @BounceBackBlackWoman on Instagram and TikTok and visit for registration information.

I'd love to have you at the table. Stay Connected with Coach Del 🌐 Website: 🎙️ Podcast: Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and all major podcast platforms 📱 Follow on Instagram & TikTok: @BounceBackBlackWoman 💼 Follow on LinkedIn: @delphinesmith